In The Midst Of It

Life comes crashing in, pounding from all sides.
Highs, Highs, Highs
Victories and Celebrations
And then the lows
So strong, so intense
The current of life moves to draw you beneath the surface
Crashing, Falling, Slipping into the Waves of Despair
But there is One
He enters the tumult, grabs me by the shoulders
And draws me in to a loving embrace
"Look at Me. See Me. I am TRUTH."
He beckons
Into the depth of my heart flows love and peace
No the waves didn't stop
Yet all is calm
My heart is settled and fixed on Him
He alone is my prize

Duality

This morning as I was praying, I was overwhelmed with anger at just how jacked up the thought processes and beliefs of the religious mind are. And how rampant and invasive these thoughts are in shaping society.

Here's one: most Christians believe that unbelievers have to go through some kind of darkness, torment or destruction for them to find God. Often praying, "God make their life a living hell until they repent. Do whatever it takes to make them turn to you." Prayers and beliefs like these are so WARPED.

Not realizing we are introducing people to the G-O-D of our religious paradigm. A God who has to be served; a vindictive, angry G-O-D who is so impotent He'll use evil and destruction to get people to turn to Him. Is this really who God is?? I think not.

Romans 2 says it is the kindness of God that leads to repentance. Psalm 23:6 says "Surely goodness and lovingkindness will follow me all the days of my life, And I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever." That word follow means to chase like a dog, to ardently pursue. It is the Father's bounty and His kind intentions that chase us down and lead us to change our mind for the better about who God is.

We see God with the eyes of our heart not through the pain and turmoil of life's realities. Pray that unbelievers will encounter God's love, yes. But also pray that through the Holy Spirit, people in places of influence, preachers in pulpits, speakers with mics in their hands, authors with pens would encounter Truth and Truth would lead them all the way home to His Father.

George McDonald once said, “Good souls many will one day be horrified at the things they now believe of God.” It's time to tear down the G-O-D paradigm and demolish the high places that the religious spirit has established. Papa is standing in the door of our shacks, looking out on all of His kids and His heart is beating with profound love for us to get it, for us to see Him as He really is. We are all Mackenzie’s. And just as Papa said to Mack in the book, The Shack, today Papa still says, “I’m not who you think I am, Mackenzie.”

I bless you today to see Him as He really is. I bless you to experience His goodness and His kind intentions towards you. I bless you, in all things: speech, thought, life to be an accurate display of His splendor in the earth. May you fully comprehend the depth of His love that beckons you into relationship with Him.

"We Are Marshall"

“We Are Marshall”

Lately Papa has been speaking to me a lot about conformity. What is it about our psyche that longs to be a part of a collective whole? Longs to fit in, to have a group to identify with, a tribe to run with, a pack?

Conformity is a type of social influence involving a change in belief or behavior in order to fit in with a group. It’s an action in accordance with some specified standard or authority.

One only has to take a glimpse at our society to see conformity everywhere. I’m republican. I’m a democrat. I’m libertarian. I’m pro-choice. I’m pro-life. I’m Protestant. I’m Catholic. I’m Lutheran. I’m a Calvinist. To claim my place in any of these camps immediately identifies me with a party line, a belief system, an ideology. “And what’s so wrong with that,” one might ask.

What is wrong with that? Or… is there something inherently woven into our DNA that calls us to the idea of being a part of something bigger than ourselves? I think the answer lies in the middle and the extremes have been a huge detriment to our society and continue to perpetuate a great disservice to mankind.

When I embrace a conformity-based system, I inherently lose my own personal voice and opinion to the party line. Even if I differ in my opinion, personal beliefs, and thought process, for the sake of appearances, I am going to say what the party says and do what the party does. My freedom is lost as a result of my choice to conform.

The danger of conformity is that it’s easy to become a parrot instead of a thinker. As a Christian, I’ve seen this often in Christian circles. We speak Christianese and tout Christian phrases and idioms. Often without examining what they mean or even more importantly, if we actually believe and agree with what we’re saying. Am I conforming to the language of my party or do I truly believe this? If you were to slice me open, step on my toe, put me in an extreme situation, at the core of who I am – what would rise to the surface? If my default response and belief is not the phrases I’m parroting then I’m not being true to myself. I’m simply conforming to fit in and be accepted.

Conformity exists because it gives us a comfort zone. Essentially, it makes us feel safe. I remember once a church leader telling my husband and I that he needed his elders to think like him. His need mimics a very real heart cry in our society. The fear of being different has created polarization, cliques, sects, perpetuated racism, sexism, and classism and limited healthy dialogue.

I’m guilty of this and I know it. It was actually inside of my own parenting and His that God began to speak to me about conformity. Doug and I have four beautifully, brilliant kids. We call our family, Murrell Tribe. During our kid’s formative years, we proudly displayed our family’s coat of arms in the playroom and chanted our family slogan, “We are the Murrell’s. We stand for honesty, integrity and service. We are HIS and He is Jesus Christ.”

Often as our kids would leave the home for social events and outings, you could catch either Doug or I looking one of the kids in their eyes and parroting the parental line, “You’re a Murrell. Remember who you are and what we stand for.”

One day in my quiet time, Papa God brought this back to my mind and Holy Spirit asked me, “Felicia, what happens if one of your kids decides they no longer want to stand for honesty, integrity or service? Do they stop being Murrell’s?”

Startled by the inquisition, I pondered. Then I answered, “No, they will also be Murrell’s.” To which He replied, “this is the downfall of conformity. It requires you to act a certain way, perform certain tasks, believe certain things to be accepted that may be completely at odds with who you truly are.” Quietly, I continued to listen and He continued, “Man has been created in Our image and Our likeness. Often you all say, ‘when you see the Three, you see One and to see One is to see Three,’ and there is truth to that. Father, Jesus and I are separate, unique and intimately distinct. We live in complete submission to one another. There is love, delight, mutual affection and togetherness amongst the three of us. But Father has never asked Me to be Him. Who I am is distinctly different from who Father is and who Jesus is. Without any One of us though, the circle would be broken. There would be lack. And we feel in Our hearts the same about you.”

“To conform is to act or appear a certain way to be like someone else. It’s when you change what you believe to what someone else believes to fit in. Most people don’t realize they are conforming because the heart longs to fit. Everyone was created with a sense of longing to discover home.” I paused to digest this truth encounter.

I then asked, “If we were created to be like Jesus, what’s the difference between conforming and being transformed?” Holy Spirit replied, “Conforming is something man does. It is an outward change, a cover up of one’s true self. Transformation is God bred from the inside and generates a whole new man. Transformation is your agreement body, soul and spirit with Father’s identity and DNA code that He knit into you from the beginning of time. It’s simply you becoming whom you were created to be.”

Not wanting to miss the depth of what Spirit was teaching me, I asked Him to continue. Holy Spirit said, “The evil one has caused mankind to fear individuality. And yet, there is a longing in the hearts of men to be individuals, to be seen and to be known. We placed that there. This is the stirring of relationships. This is the invitation to enter our circle of togetherness, mutual affection, delight and love.”

Where there is love, there is respect. Where there is love, there is honor. Where there is love, there is freedom.  It is love that breeds life and love that gives people permission to be uniquely them. Love says you don’t have to believe like I do to be accepted by me. Love says you don’t have to think like I do or do the same things I do or live your life the way I live mine to be accepted by me. Love allows me to love the person in front of me void of any demands of conformity. Love says I don’t need you to be like me to feel safe with you.

I’m challenged everyday in my living this out. I want to give my kids a sense of identity, a sense of belonging. But I realize that the only life giving, fruit-bearing connection I can hand them is to connect them to Father, Jesus and Holy Spirit. It is Father who gives identity to each one of us individually. It is Father, who so loves our uniqueness that He created several stars, different colors, random shades of skin, two genders. Just as random stars grouped together form constellations and multiple hues of color form a rainbow, in the collective whole, there is distinct individuality. And yet together in our unity, we create a spectacular display of His splendor.

Contrast my parenting as described above with that of Father God. Jesus was so uniquely Him. So much so, that He deeply offended the religious right of His day. They were angry to the point of murder, wanting to crucify One so starkly different and individual. But what a picture of freedom, of permission to be unique, of what it looks like to love the person in front of you even if they aren’t like you or have the same values as you. This is the Son Papa created. This is the Son in whose image you and I are created. And this is the tribe I want to be connected to: Father, Son and Spirit, the tribe of the free, the tribe of love.

Tis true that we all have been created to be a part of something greater than ourselves. But that something isn’t any man made system that exists in our society. Form over function is like choosing façade over appearance. Zoe, the God kind of life only flows through Agape, unconditional love. We have all been created to be in relationship with Father, Jesus and Holy Spirit. In that relationship, conformity is not demanded or required. In that relationship is limitless freedom and abounding love.

Renown

From Shame to Fame
I live to make His name renown

No longer timid or caught in the web of false humility
My eyes hath opened
I now realize the lie in its severity
"It's not me, it's Jesus," I've meekly replied

"More of Him and less of me"
My Christian cliche to ward off pride

Through the lens of love
Truth is revealed
All the broken and shattered places are healed

True humility is my total dependence on You
All of me covered by all of Thee
No longer do I cower or seek
to hide my greatness
No longer do I run or shy away from radiance

I know who I am and what I carry
Overshadowed by Your Spirit just like Mary

I'm a beggar before You
And a King before Men
I've got to have more of Your Presence
For breakthrough I doth contend

I'm not satisfied with the status quo
I want to see greater works
An heir to Abraham's promise is who I am
Through me the nations of the world will be blessed

From Shame to Fame
I've been freed to make Your name renown
I know who owns the crown

The glory which Abba gave You
You've given to us
An encounter with You we owe to the world
To demonstrate Your love is a must

From Shame to Fame
How glorious Your name
in all the Earth
For none can compare
to Your matchless worth!

To walk with You
To live for You
To make Your name renown
I've accepted that you've
enabled me, equipped me, empowered me
to do good works

No longer will I cower or shy away from
All you've called me to do
I've come into alignment
You've given me an assignment
That only I can carry through

I am your workmanship
An original masterpiece
I will bring you fame
Because that's who you've
created me to be

To be an influencer
An encourager
A lover
A peacemaker with all men
To bring Heaven's reality to Earth
No matter the circle I'm in

To believe that You are
And that Your power dwells in me
A life of co-laboring is my destiny

Creation is groaning for the unveiling of sons
It's time for us to take our rightful place

To encounter the love of God
To become an encounter
To lead others into your face

From shame to fame
I live to make Your name renown
You chose me
You've called me to succeed

The shining of my light
A mere reflection of Your glory

Everything I am is because of You
For the glory of my King
I live to see my grave emptied
Every ounce of my destiny spent
I'm not satisfied with the status quo
Enlarge my capacity for more

Fill me to the full, then fill me again
Let Your goodness overflow from my brim
The overflow is for my guests
Through me the nations of the world will be blessed

This is my destiny
This is who You've called me to be
From Shame to Fame
I live to make Your name renown
For I'm complete in You

Make me Thy fuel, O Flame of God



©2010 Felicia Murrell

Embracing Change

Change is always such an interesting animal. Yesterday, I was surprised to arrive at Land of A Thousand Hills Walton to find that it no longer existed. In its place was the Chattahoochee Coffee Company(http://chattahoocheecoffee.com/blog/land-thousand-hills-walton-becomes-chattahoochee-coffee-company). At first I hesitated, a bit skeptical at what I'd find. On I went though, curious to see what changes had been made. Inside the door, I immediately became aware that the "Drink Coffee. Do Good." slogan no longer reigned anywhere in the building. Another glance greeted me with a sign announcing that Chattahoochee Coffee Company proudly served Counter Culture coffee. Big ups for them. Admittedly, I have a fetish for this great coffee so seeing it there put me at ease. At least, I'd still have a great view of the river and a good cuppa cuppa. That much hadn't changed.

After spending almost six hours there, decompressing by the river, enjoy conversation with a great friend and feasting on my wonderful Farmhouse blend French press, I left there with a cheery smile and a wave goodbye from my barista. As I got in the car, I realized that while the name and the mission had changed somewhat, much of what I loved about that coffee shop - the view, their passion for justice, the baristas - clearly were still the same.

From there I traveled 45 miles south to enjoy a dinner party for friends celebrating their 25th wedding anniversary. Again, I take a deep breath and I shake off the hesitancies of change. While I've cherished this dear friend and her family since our arrival in GA, her circle of community has changed since we've forged our friendship and mine is in great flux. It's her dinner party, not mine. There would be people that I know but am just merely acquainted with. Here again, I would meet change head on. As we laughed, ate, and shared glasses of wine, I realized that these mere acquaintances and I had much in common and a great sense of camaraderie was deepening our hearts to pursue a greater depth of relationship. I thought to myself, why do we avoid change? Why do we dread it so? Change isn't all that bad.

If situations hadn't happened the way they did, I would never be in the company of change. In the midst of great upheaval, a friend said to me, "This is what you prayed for. Press in. Don't quit." And she was right, only I did not know it would look like this. I feel like God is setting me up for 2014. A year where some things will be different, but at the heart of it, many things will still be the same. Upon first glance, there may be a sense of hesitation, trepidation even. But then further inspection will allow me to see telltale signs of old familiar comforts, true norths that center in the midst of transition.

Truly much of life is shift and transition because we're always moving forward. I can't find happy in going back. Happiness is the result of an inside world that is at home in Father's embrace. A place of joy, contentment and peace that is only found in knowing and resting in Him. But I can courageously embrace what lies ahead. While the mission, vision and purpose hasn't changed at all, perhaps shift is happening to the vehicle through which those things are arrived at.

I left my friend's dinner party feeling victorious. I can do this. I can embrace a new name, a new community. Change isn't half bad. I'm content that shift has provided an opportunity to widen my community of coffee shops, embrace new friendships, and dream and soar with like minded people. With the words of Paul Young fresh in my heart, I offered his words to the Lord, "I open me to what you want to do in my life, even when I can't begin to understand it. Give me the courage to go into the places you want to send me and the ears to hear your invitation."

May I encourage and bless you to look for the true norths. Look for the signs of the familiar and then trod ahead into change embracing the transition and the company of friends who'll join you on the journey.

May 2014 be a year of connection, conversation and collaboration with people who are coming alive in Him. May you find yourself in relationships that are marked with honesty, openness, intentionality, authenticity and freedom.

Embrace Change! Happy New Year! 

Raising Daniel or Raising Cain?

Charisma has an article today from someone who used to be one of Obama's bodyguards. The headline reads, "It's worse than anyone thought." 

Admittedly, I didn't read this article. But scrolling through and seeing the title, my heart had one thought - If it's worse, then it's a great opportunity for the believers close to him to be Daniel to a perceived "Nebuchadnezzar". 

We (believers corporately) are living in the hour of great opportunity and yet we persist to talk rather than declare, slander rather than love. The evil one has become our (unbelieving believers) ally in the name of God. 

Interesting that gold miners never stopped to "bash" the dirt while digging for gold. They just tossed it aside as fast as they could with a laser focus that was intent on discovering gold.  

This is an hour of opportunity. We can keep staring at dirt covered people, caked in worms and debris and cry foul, partnering with the adversary to point out every problem. Or like the extravagant Father who buried his face into the skin of a son who'd spent days in a pig sty kissing him repeatedly, we can pursue the dirty with love and offer them safe passage home. 

When it comes to politics, believers are often like cats with claws, viciously scratching up and tearing down everything and everyone that holds a view opposing to their beliefs of pro life, death sentence, gun control, welfare and taxes. When did the issues outweigh loving people? 

Like the elder brother pissed off that the younger son freely chose a differently lifestyle, we make a list of every negative thought, action, belief and voting record of the perceived younger son. 

Again I ask, where are the Daniel's who will arise and serve the demonic with honor, with love, with great compassion (see Dan. 2 & Dan. 4)? 

Father's love is so transformative. It allows us the freedom to be ok with people who are not like us. It allows us the freedom to love people without needing to convince them to change and be like us. When love wholly woos us and transforms us, we become convinced that love can do what debate, fear and slander never will. Love is enough because God is enough and God is love. Love isn't passive, sloppy or weak. Love is kind. Love is full of chesed (mercy). 

At the root of both the religious and political spirit is fear. How many times have we heard it said, "I'm afraid of what will happen to us if "this man" - not even worthy of the honor of being called "President" - remains in office?" "I'm afraid that people are sleeping on the issues. They don't really know. I've got to wan them. I've got to tell them. I've got to convince them that this guy I out to hurt us, destroy us! Impeach him! Impeach him!"  And so the heart filled with fear rants and rages, isolates and ostracizes. And all of that fear - Fear of what will happen to my country, my money. Fear of what will happen to people if they have too much freedom, if they aren't controlled and "directed" - becomes the motivation for our discourse, in the name of God, of course, instead of love. Perfect love casts out fear. 

Let me encourage you today, set aside your political agenda for one moment. Take your colored lenses off. Take a deep breath and ask Holy Spirit these two questions: 1) Holy Spirit, how would you like me to partner with you in praying for our president (mayor, congressman, governor) today? 2) How would you like me to direct my words, my prayers to declare a heaven filled solution to our world (name of your city, our government - local, state and federal) today? 

Outta Sight. Out of Mind.

Ever walked out to your garage in search of something? In the frey of discarded and stored things, you discover an item you forgot you had. Something precious. Something often used but now tucked away. You pick the item up, recalling with fondness its use. Perhaps you dust it off and bring it back inside. Relationships can be like that. Contextual in nature, we move from one season to the next. People once connected to you through context no longer at the forefront of your daily interactions. Tucked away, like items in the garage. Stored memories of happy times, fond times. 

I've traveled so many diverse paths in my life's journey, I for one, am grateful for Facebook that bring those often tucked away contextual relationships back inside my heart and the walls of my daily life. 

Even more than that, I'm grateful for friends that continue to pursue relationship even after the context of our situations have changed. 

Stop for a moment. Think about it. In the busyness of life, whom have you pursued this week? Cup of coffee? A quick "thinking about you" text? Shared meal? 

In the heart of every person is the longing for pursuit. Placed within us by a good God who said, "it is not good for man to be alone."

The pursuit of another is modeled in our love relationship with the Godhead. For He beckons us, "Draw near to God and He will draw near to you." 

Connectedness is the result of requited pursuit. I bless you today to experience a sense of connection with God and with others.